A mother's journey

Published August 2, 2012

Positive Parenting

“Life as parent at 50 has been an adventure,” reminisced Jacquelyne Hussey-Pearson, mother of three who turned 50 in June this year.

Hussey-Pearson, who came to Jamaica from the United Kingdom, fell in love with the country and continues to draw inspiration for her artistic pursuits. 

“When I had my first son I was so much in shock, because everybody has advise for you, everyone tells you how to bring up your baby, what you should do what you shouldn’t do….

“I am now standing on the anniversary of Jamaica’s 50 reflecting my life and my transitions of my journey. Looking at my children, I am proud, so very proud,” she said. 

 “Now I stand back at 50 and look at my children who are more than capable of dealing with challenges in their lives, it's been a long journey with rough edges but I don’t have any complaints,” she said. 

Bringing up the children had its share of trials and tribulations – she moved to Cooper’s Hill, after separating from her husband. 

“There was nothing there (their house) on the map after that,” she said laughing. “The children said mummy we hate you, you took us from all our friends, and you took us to nowhere, in the midst of duppies.”

The painter, songwriter recalled that raising her children was a roller coaster ride – tiring, backbreaking at times but worth the effort. 

“I worked for the children, I would drive the children to school and it would take me five hours to do the morning run and chores, by the time I was back home, it would be time to drive back down the hill and pick up the children after 2.”

Life was tough too, she recalled, when Jonathan, her eldest son, was two, they used to walk on the beach to search for driftwood, because she could not afford to buy coal to cook. “A wood fire allowed me to cook one pot soup, I used to make it an adventure.”

Memories of her children growing up are etched in her mind as much as they are at home, those were days of no fancy gadgets and the open yard used to be the ‘playstation’ and their gibberish music to ears. “I remember Arianne, as a young girl used to sit on the ground with knives forks and spoons and she was always digging up the soil.

“She was 3½ she said she wanted to be a archay a ha ha e dist…I never understood what she meant until she showed me archeologists on TV,” added Hussey-Pearson, as she broke into a broad smile.  “She is 15 now and now she is going to be an artist, it has been a pleasure watching her grow.” 

With finances stabilising and things shaping up, Hussey-Pearson, like any parent was dreaming about her children growing wings and fly out in their life pursuits. But God was writing a completely different chapter of her life, which turned her world upside down.

“After having been a parent for 27 years my children have gone visiting with their daddies,” she said…paused and added “The reason my children are not with me now is because I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2010. 

“The children went through the chemotherapy with me, it broke their heart and it broke my heart seeing my children so now they are with their fathers transitioning and stabalising their lives.”

She is still battling with breast cancer. 

“I am fighting as a warrior – I am watching my children from afar knowing they are loved as much love as I could give them, which was one of the major fears of not having my children with me.” 

Apprehensive at first, myriad of thoughts came to her. “Dying without my children knowing that I loved them would have been very sad – but now that they have transitioned with their fathers and have got used to not having me there 24/7,”she said. 

Hussey-Pearson seeks solace in arts and music - she continues to create paintings, writing and singing songs to overcome the pain of separation from her children. 

She cherishes the time spent with them and as an angel is watching them evolve and grow. “They are becoming more stable and the tools I have given them seem to be helping them transition through their lives.”

“Being a mother, an artist I am enthralled and full of joy – in the years to come they can tell my grandchildren that I strived to be the greatest grandmother,” she exuded. “To all of my children and friends who are 50 this year who are mothers, fathers and grandmothers…congratulations on giving us the generation of tomorrow.”